God's Grace

After after a day of traveling to the hospital coming and going for feedings Cam and I were exhausted emotional and physically. The doctors and nurses told us they wanted to keep Paisley one more day at least. We just did not understand, we cried out to God in complaint. In between feedings we drove around the houses in Redlands and planned out all these reasons we should be able to take our baby home. We had our game plan ready for when we went in next. Wehat we were really doing was trying to take the whole situation into our own hands. Well usually when you do this it doesn't work....and it didn't! The nurse (we both disliked she sweet-talked us) shot down all our reasons we thought it was better she went home. Little did we know and think that God wanted to keep her there one more day to teach us. Despite lots of tears me and Cam developed our relationship on new levels. We learned that God is full of Grace and mercy. As the day went on he showed us numerous glimpses of his grace. First glimpse, so they weighted Paisley before and after each feeding to see how much she ate. Well the next feeding she gained the exact amount they wanted to see her eating, coincidence or God you can decide. Next glimpse, as I was coming up the elevator I started talking to this lady asking about the baby she was there for. She was the grandma of Logan the micro premie next to Paisley. Micro premie, he was born at 22 weeks, less than a pound. We talked for a bit I got the whole story and told her I would be praying for Logan and his mom because they were on a long journey much longer than ours. Another reminder our situation could be a lot worse. Maybe that's why God wanted Paisley to stay another night so I would meet this grandma and we could encourage each other. Everything happens for a reason. Third glimpse, so Paisley had this feeding tube in her nose went straight to her stomach. They feed her thought that when she was too tired to eat. (They gorged my poor baby in there.) Any way, so Cam and I had talked about asking them to take it out it was a hinderence to getting her strong enough to be able to come home. Well our little stubborn fighter did not like all the things on her from the get-go. Low-and-behold as Cam is holding her she rips the thing right out. Was she trying to tell us something, was God showing through our little girl that he was in charge and not the nurses. Last glimpse of Gods Grace was the night nurse we had. She was patient and caring. She shared with Cam the specific diagnosis of Paisley and saw how healthy she was getting. She appeared to think and wonder why Paisely was still in there too. Did God Grace us with this nurse to provide a glimpse of hope? At the end of the night we went home with much different emotions then the night before. Earlier we had talked about not crying on the way home and we almost achieved that. Our tears this time were more joyful and thankful. We were filled with joy at how our bigger than big God had cared about our complaining selves and revealed numerous glimpses of his love to us. He did not have to but he did because he loves us.

Homestretch

Week 38 and 39 

Total weight gain: gained 25 pounds

Maternity clothes: my favorite maternity shorts but rug all shirts.

Stretch marks: No new ones.

Sleep: Getting up a couple times to go to the bathroom because my whole stomach just aches, peeing helps a little. It's starting to get uncomfortable but nothing that keeps me from sleep.

Best moment of this week: Going to dog beach with Trouty. He loved running up and down the shore but avoids the water.

Miss anything: energy.

Movement: Oh yes she is moving even more, she has not slowed down at all!

Food cravings: nothing really new. Just same old In-n-Out

Belly button in or out: It's getting smaller.

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Happy or moody most of the time: Mostly happy

Looking forward to: Birthday and wishing she would come early for my present.

Total weight gain: gained 25 pounds

Best moment of this week: Going down to Redondo Beach to ride bikes and eat at Rudy's. Yep 39 weeks and riding a bike, my dad tried to stop me saying it wasn't good, mom and Cam thought it was ok. 

Miss anything: room to eat and not feel full all the time.

Movement: Oh yes, still not slowing down.

Food cravings: nothing really new, just French fries

Belly button in or out: It's getting smaller.

Wedding rings on or off: On,

Looking forward to: Her coming!